Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Ellie May

We lost our poor little Ellie May last Friday night:( I'm not sure what is going on, but it has been a crazy, crazy year around here. Three friends of mine have lost their young parents unexpectedly in the last three months. My sister's dog was attacked by a neighbor's dog and almost died. Andy's parent's dog passed away in September. My parents dog passed away three weeks ago. My grandmother last week. Now Ellie May.

Thank God I have been blessed immeasurably this year, but the stress of everything going on around me is out of control. When it rains, it pours.

Please be forewarned...I don't want to offend anybody. The following contains a graphic description of what happened.

The day after my grandmother died, she started acting really weird and reverted to using the bathroom in the house. I took her to the vet and she received IV fluids and ended up being diagnosed with a UTI/cystitis. The doctor did feel a pea-sized soft tissue mass in her bottom, but didn't think anything of it.

Last Wednesday night, we noticed that she hadn't been eating much and was straining to urinate. By Thursday night, she couldn't pee, poop, and her breathing was really labored. To the point of her abdomen sucking in at the sides as she was gasping for air. We were worried sick and up with her all Thursday night trying to comfort her and take her to the water bowl.

I went to work Friday morning and Andy took her back to the vet. He called me around lunchtime upset because the mass had increased to the size of a grape, her heart was enlarged, and she had fluid all around her lungs. Our vet said that we should probably take her to the emergency vet to get a closer look with an ultrasound. I had to leave work because I was hysterical, and met up with Andy to take her for the ultrasound.

The ultrasound showed a pelvic mass, masses on her liver, enlarged liver vessels, a possible mass on the bottom of her heart, fluid around her lungs, and a paralytic bowel. It was likely cancer, but it couldn't be confirmed without a biopsy. Our only options were to wait until this week to get an appointment with a specialist in Columbia, or put our poor baby to sleep. All financial issues aside, even if she would have seen a specialist/surgery, there is a chance that it was so bad that she wouldn't survive anyway. The way she was acting, we don't feel she would have made it through the weekend.

By this time we were both crying like babies and watching her struggle to breathe. She was suffering. We both agreed that we couldn't go another night watching her like this. It was the hardest decision we've ever had to make. We sat there with her saying our goodbyes and just holding her. So horrible. I think that I would much rather come home and find her gone from old age, then us having to make this decision and watch a doctor put her to sleep. Kudos to those who have had the strength to put your dog to sleep.

I had to leave the room and go sit in the car. Andy held her. They brought her out to us, and we buried her in my parent's backyard. Griswold is so confused...even though she did her best to avoid him, he really did love her. He has been searching for her around the house every day, and it breaks my heart.
 
We rescued Ellie at the same time we started trying to conceive in 2005. We took her home later to find out that she had glaucoma and was completely blind. She basically had a migraine 24/7 from the eye pressure. She had surgery to remove her eyes and was a completely different dog...no longer in pain. From what we gather, her previous owner didn't want to deal with her health issues, so they dumped her at the pound. We are not exactly sure how old she was, but gave her a life that she wouldn't have had otherwise. Yes, she was our problem child and very territorial, but this was because of the fact that she was blind and was never socialized as a puppy. She loved us unconditionally and knew that Andy and I came into her life to protect her. She trusted us. Now, I am finally pregnant and we had to say goodbye.

People who have never owned pets just don't get it. You are around them constantly and they become a part of your family. Since we couldn't have children, our dogs are our children. She has been a companion to us through all of these years of infertility. When we didn't have anyone to come home to, there was Ellie May...always growling and waiting for a treat and a belly rub. Girl could eat. That's probably why she was overweight. But, she was happy and that's all that matters.

I put together a slideshow of our time together. Rest in peace Ellie May...we know that you are in puppy heaven prancing around with a skinny body, a good knee, all of your teeth, and 20/20 vision! I know you still have that gremlin growl and are trying to bite strangers though. That's my girl:)



14 comments:

Anonymous said...

She was so lucky to have ya'll! She definitely won the lottery when ya'll rescued her. Such a hard thing to do, Jessica and Andy. It just proved how much you loved her. She is no longer in any pain. Love ya'll!

Andrea

E and R said...

I am so sorry for your loss. My dogs mean the world to me and I can understand the devastation this loss brings. You made a tough decision, but it was, no doubt, the right decision as she is no longer in pain.

Jenny H said...

So sorry for your loss and your pain during this time. Truly looks like Ellie May was given a full life thanks to you 2. She was so loved.
Hang in there. It seemed to pour when I was pregnant too. Thank God for those sweet boys and every precious day we are given.

Kim said...

So sorry for the loss of your furbaby, as hard as it was, we would have done the same thing. :( Rest in peace sweet little Ellie May!

Lauren Y. said...

so sorry and sad for you :( I know that is so tough...especially out of the blue! rest in peace sweet girl!

Whitbit said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I completely understand the companionship of animals being incomparable. The whole 4 years we were unable to conceive, we felt like we were building a zoo! We ended up with 2 dogs and 2 cats. Last year we had a year a lot like yours, a lot of death was hovering. I hope the year gets better and your family can enjoy its joyful blessing.

Sarah said...

Im so very sorry for your loss :( We lost our sweet puppy in January :( He was hit by a car. Worst day of my life I think, besides our miscarriage. Hugs...

KJS said...

Beast crying...that breaks my heart...not really sure what I'll do when I lose my cat Gracie - she is our firstborn and has my heart!!!!! Prayers for you and Andy...ugh, I'm so sorry :(

R. said...

Im so sorry.

AnotherDreamer said...

So sorry for your loss (*hugs*) She was very lucky to have you and the time you spent together.

Ronda said...

It's very difficult to put your beloved pet to sleep! When our "Angel" was at that point, God helped me decide. She would be better in Heaven than suffering on Earth. Please know in your Heart you and Andy made the right decision. You both were God's gift to her! I'm sorry......

I'm saddened to hear of the passing of your grandmother. I can only imagine how excited she was with her great grandsons 2012arrival. Please know I'm praying for you and your family. With deepest Sympathy, Ronda

Ronda said...

I love the tribute to your precious puppy! The memories will last a lifetime!

Anonymous said...

Awe the slide show made me cry. She was very loved and spoiled by you guys. So glad we got to visit a few weeks ago and see her one more time. I bet her and Boomer are having a blast now. Love you all!
Dad and Barbara

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry. I completely agree that our dogs are our most loyal friend,protector,confidant, and entertainment!! I had to make the decision to put my dog down years ago and completely understand the heartbreak you have. So sorry.
Heather