Cautiously Optimistic Plan!

Low and behold our donor passed all of her tests and we received another schedule folks! Woohoo! This marks the third time since February that we have tried to do this, so we are not putting all of our "eggs" in one basket yet. We know that this is ALL in God's hands and we refuse to take the reins because He is in control of the outcome! It's easy to get desperate for this to happen, but over time I've realized that our patience is being tested for a reason. If we interfere with His plan, it just makes us look selfish and sets us up for more disappointment and embarrassment.

As of now, I am set to resume my Lupron injections tomorrow and stop the BCP on Friday. I should have a period sometime next week, and then I will begin the escalating doses of estrogen. If everything goes as planned, she will begin stims mid-June and retrieval is set for June 28. Our transfer *may* happen around July 1-3ish!!!

All we can do is sit back and enjoy the ride. If we get all worked up and paranoid about it actually working this time, then it will make things very stressful around here and we don't need that! We definitely have to give all of our worries to God and allow room for error.

We just returned from an awesome 10th anniversary roadtrip to Chicago...we were able to see most of the city and visit with my little sis! I will post some pics soon.

Right now, the pool and a few...well maybe more than a few...strawberry daiquiris are calling my name! For now, we will keep living our life and having fun. Hope everyone has a fun and safe weekend!

A Decade Later...

Exactly ten years and thirty pounds ago, Andy and I were saying "I do!"

I cannot believe it has already been ten years. I also cannot believe everything we've been through in our short time together!

We are in Chicago celebrating and spending time with my sister...awesome city! Tonight we will celebrate with a big fat filet and some cocktails at the top of the Hancock.

I know I say this every year, but this will be the LAST year we celebrate alone.

We WILL be a family of three by our eleventh!

My Uterus Has Exploded!

Warning: If you are easily grossed out, you probably should not be reading a blog with the word "Uterus" in the title. That is all.

After being off all of my medications for more than a week now, Aunt Flo finally arrived on Friday!!! This is probably the only time you will find me happy to see her!

I haven't had a period in almost two months, so this should be fun. My lining is probably 5 feet thick and thriving.

I start back on BCP tonight, and our nurse will be in touch soon with a new schedule! If all goes as planned, it looks like we will have a transfer around the end of June!

Last year, I was curled up in my bed, crying, and watching Lifetime movies. All. Day. Long. This Mother's Day has been MUCH better. I think that I hit rock bottom last year after our miscarriage. I'm so grateful that I have such wonderful support system...I wouldn't have any hope if it wasn't for God, my family, fellow bloggers, and friends that have actually stuck around through all of this madness!

Andy has completely made my Mother's Day...I woke up with a gift certificate for a Spa Mani/Pedi, and he is cooking me an awesome dinner tonight...pork tenderloin, pineapple casserole, and potato casserole! He told me that he was sick of me being left out on Mother's Day, so he was going to give me a good day:) Poor thing even ripped up all of the carpet and installed floors this weekend! I just hung out with my family and hid in the computer room so that I wouldn't have a panic attack from the mess that is our house. He did such a good job!

Before

After

We also took my mom and grandmother out for a nice lunch yesterday. Here is a picture of four generations...sans my youngest sister Elizabeth who just moved to Chicago:(

From left to right: Me, Mom, Brother, Grandmother, Brother-In-Law, Sister, and my beautiful niece!

I might as well throw in my FAVORITE picture of my mom and I. My mom told me that I was pitching a fit up until the second this picture was snapped. Dang mood swings!

I hope all of you had a wonderful Mother's Day. My heart has been heavy for those who have lost their mother, and for those of us who would give anything to be a mom.

One day we WILL be included in this holiday!

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. ~Rajneesh

Third Time's a Charm?

Andy and I have officially picked out our THIRD donor since January. Hopefully this will be the one that "sticks"!

We submitted our choices last night, and were matched today with our first pick. I received an email this morning from my nurse telling us that we are going to be the primary couple for this cycle, yay! I thought that we were going to have to wait another month or so for a secondary couple to sign on, but guess what? Another couple picked her yesterday too! That means we can get started right away!!! I forgot that our clinic guarantees a primary position if you were secondary during the previous cycle...score!

I am to call my nurse when I start my period (my uterus should be exploding any day now) and she will get me started back on those awesome birth control pills. Then comes the Lupron, and you know the rest of the story. The entire process will probably take another 6-8 weeks, pending no delays.

Our donor still has to undergo the new genetic tests that they have added to their protocol, so we are not getting our hopes up yet. Our first donor was dropped after coming back as a carrier for a genetic disorder. I think our guard has officially been placed into the lock position until we actually take a baby home from the hospital. We have faith that it will eventually happen, but we remain somewhat cynical of the entire process in general. There is just too much room for error!

My doctor did call me personally, from his cell phone, to apologize again about our cycle being canceled at retrieval. He reiterated the fact that what happened is a very rare occurrence. I reminded him that everything that has happened to Andy and I has been a rare occurrence. We just roll like that. He urged us to continue to trust in them and they will do everything in their power to give us a successful donor cycle. I really wanted to ask him if he had thought about kicking us out of their clinic because we are ruining their success rates, but I refrained. Haha!

I'm really excited about this donor. According to her profile, she has been a donor once before. This means that they wouldn't have let her back into the program unless she had a good outcome last time. She is married, 5'6", 135 lbs, and about to graduate with honors to become a teacher. Her hobbies include singing, writing, gymnastics, swimming, dance...and she loves football! Sounds like my kind of girl! Our last donor's baby picture looked nothing like me, but this one bears some resemblance to me with brown hair and eyes. She also comes from a mutt background like I do...her mother is Irish, father is French/Italian, and grandmother is Greek/Italian. I would LOVE to post her picture, but since this is an anonymous cycle I'm not allowed to do so. You never know if she or someone who knows her will come across my blog one day.

So, we are about to hop on this Scream Machine for the 7,193,485,793,865,987th time. Thanks again for all of your support and for sticking with us throughout all of this madness...you guys ROCK!