No Snowbabies

RIP Gobble, Hambone, Greenbean, Cornbread, and Cranberry:(

The last 5 embryos didn't make it to freeze...so there goes another frozen cycle down the drain if we need it. The package that we bought includes 3 fresh and 3 frozen cycles, but you forfeit a frozen cycle if there are no embryos after a fresh attempt. Always a catch.

We're still praying that Giblet and Shweet T are hanging in there. The embryologist said that this is not an indication of how they will do because they were a much better quality than the others. Plus, they're in a natural environment.

I'm not as afraid that they're going to fall out this time! I was told that an embryo transfer is like putting a grain of rice into a bowl of peanut butter...so that's reassuring.

I'm still feeling fine, actually pretty normal. Bloated and hungry 24/7, but those are the main side effects of the progesterone/estrogen supplements I'm taking. According to the timeline, the embryos should be implanting Sunday or Monday...that is, if everything is coming along down there.

I hope I have a bowl of some really sticky peanut butter.

A Different Perspective

I used to love laying underneath the Christmas tree when I was little...

Tonight, I decided to revisit my childhood wonders. I still say the view from this perspective is much better...

Not only did Andy walk in and think I was crazy...someone else was curious too.
Now, how many of you are going to give it a try?

Giblet and Shweet T

Sorry I haven't posted earlier...I just woke up from a Valium high. Man, that stuff knocks me out.

I received a call at 6:30 this morning letting me know that we were going to do our transfer! We drove to Charleston and the transfer took place at about 11:30.

All 7 embabies were still growing, but there was a group of 4 that looked really good. They transferred the best two out of that group. One was an 8 cell Grade 1, the other was an 8 cell Grade 2 (Grading is 1-4, with 1 being the best). We talked about transferring 3, but it only increases my chances of pregnancy by 2%....and increases the chances of triplets by 15%. So really there would be no benefit in transferring 3 vs. 2. They will let the other five continue to grow until Friday. It is at that time they will know if any are healthy enough to freeze. Our doctor said that there is a 50% chance that we will have at least one to freeze, so we'll see.

I'm on bedrest for 48 hours and will then have to limit my activity for the rest of the two week wait. We are going to drive back home tomorrow so that I can celebrate Turkey Day on my own couch!

We decided to name our embabies in honor of Turkey Day. Giblet and Shweet T are floating around in my uterus right now. Gobble, Hambone, Greenbean, Cornbread, and Cranberry are chilling at the lab hoping that they can be frozen on Friday. I hope that the embryologist feeds them a nice Thanksgiving dinner.

Today, I am thankful for all of your prayers and for all of our embabies. We hope that we will receive the best Christmas gift ever this year. I've posted some pictures of our transfer today. I hope everyone has a Happy Turkey Day!

Our 7 little miracle embabies...I think Giblet and Shweet T are the 2 less fragmented ones on the middle row (first 2 from the left).

Giblet and Shweet T in my uterus after the transfer

Proud parents with the ultrasound of our Maybe Babies! I was doped up on Valium and enjoying those stirrups.

Today, We Are Blessed

Out of the 12 eggs retrieved, 10 were mature...and 7 have fertilized!

That's right, we have 7 embabies as of this morning. That's much better than the phone call I received during IVF #1 saying that we only had 1. The embryologist will let them stay in the incubator until early Tuesday. We will get a call that morning to let us know how many have continued to survive, and if we are going to do a transfer on Tuesday or Thursday. They will transfer the 2 best embryos and freeze the remaining for future use.

Just a small favor...we appreciate your enthusiasm and support for our situation. However, this blog was created as a forum to share personal information about our infertility with those we wish to share it with. All of our family, close friends, and the fellow bloggers who come across it are welcome to this blog. Please respect our privacy by not posting our private matters as comments/status updates on a public forum, i.e. facebook, myspace, etc. This has spawned from several incidents, not just one in particular. All of those we wish to communicate our information to have been led to this blog, which is unsearchable by search engines. Let's face it...facebook is the world's biggest gossip mill, and my ex boyfriend from 6th grade doesn't need to know about my wonky reproductive system. Please direct all of your comments to this site. Thanks:)

Please pray that our "Lucky 7" continue to divide and stay healthy. We want to thank everyone for all of the prayers lately...they worked!

God is good.

A Dozen Eggs

We have 12 eggs!

I am feeling fine...just a little uncomfortable, but the pain meds are pretty sweet. I'm taking it easy and praying that we will get a good fertilization report in the morning. The embryologist said that they all look good under the microscope, but we won't know their true quality until tomorrow.

I got to meet my niece yesterday and I fell in love the second I laid eyes on her. This Aunt is going to spoil her rotten. My sister is doing really good...they get to come home today!

Just think, a dozen AndyJessicas are simmering in a petri dish at this very minute...please pray for us!

It's Jacko Time!

Just a quick update! I've got a lot to do before tomorrow!

My estrogen went from 1777 to 2700...my retrieval is set for early Saturday morning! Based this morning's ultrasound and labs, they estimate that there will be around 11 mature eggs. They also said that they are pleased because I have responded SO much better than last cycle. Thank you God.

Tonight, I will discontinue all of my other injections and do my HCG trigger shot at 10 p.m. sharp. Click here to see a previous blog entry explaining the importance of this injection.

I have to go back to my Augusta doctor once again tomorrow morning for labs. This is to make sure that my HCG level is sufficient and doing its job. We will hit the road after my appointment so that we can get settled in Charleston.

There will be one little pit stop along the way...well kind of out of the way, but who cares! I'm going to get to meet my niece before I'm on bedrest!

I should be feeling pretty good after my dose of Jacko on Saturday, so I'll post an update once we find out how many were retrieved. We'll be coming back home after surgery this time and waiting for them to call with our fertilization report. Waiting for that call is going to be pretty stressful. After 6 weeks of torturous and expensive medications combined with emotional kicks in the ass, it all comes down to that one call. Please pray for some good embabies this time!

You're Getting on my Last Hormone

Stimulation Day 10

I'm Aunt Jessica for the second time this year! My sister had her baby girl at 5:44 p.m. today. She weighs 8 lbs 1 oz and is 21 inches long. This is the first grandchild on my side of the family. My sister and her hubby live a few hours away so I haven't met her yet, but she is absolutely perfect in the pics!

My estrogen is now 1777 (from 1000 two days ago) and lining is 11.8 mm. I still have about 13 follicles and they are all growing nicely. A little more than half are now mature, but they want me to take another day of Follistim in hopes that the others will catch up and be mature by retrieval. It looks as if I will have my HCG trigger shot tomorrow night if everything looks okay at my appointment tomorrow morning. This means we will head to Charleston on Friday for preop and our last ultrasound/labs and my retrieval will be early Saturday morning. The transfer will take place on Tuesday (Day 3) or Thursday (Day 5). Yes, Thanksgiving Day.

I'm trying to stay in a good mood and not complain, but I'm beginning to get really irritated this time around. I hate how there isn't a set schedule with this. I never know when I'm going to have to go to an appointment until the last minute. It's torture asking off work every other day when I'm usually required to give a 2 month notice for time off. I'm sure that they understand, but it's still very uncomfortable. I always feel that I have to justify why I'm needing off...all because I want what is supposed to be the most natural part of human life. Unfortunately, I can't get pregnant the old fashioned way and it makes me feel like an outcast. Unfortunately most people who can easily have children do not understand why we would willingly put ourselves through this, why we don't "just adopt" or consider other options. Unfortunately, I can't quit my job because my original plan of being a stay at home mom is shot...considering all of our savings is beyond dunzo. I know that I have become extremely open about this entire process, partly because I couldn't hide it if I tried. I just hate that I have to bring my problems to work instead of leaving them at home. It has consumed my entire life.

I'm sorry, I've just had a few things said to me recently that have rubbed me the wrong way and it's hard to keep a smile on my face and act like it doesn't bother me. All I have to say is, I'm going to pick my battles and I have found out who my true friends are throughout this journey. I appreciate each and every one of you and I'm glad that I can get away from those who just don't understand and look here for support each day. I have been horrible at commenting back because I've been so busy lately and I'm sorry. I promise I will catch up while on bed rest this next week!

Can't. Move.

Stimulation Day 8

Ouch.

I've already forgotten how uncomfortable this is. I need to take a picture of my belly because it already looks like I'm 5 months pregnant. I'll just pretend I'm pregnant...with two sasquatch ovaries.

As of this morning, my estrogen is a little over 1000, progesterone is 1.04, and uterine lining is 10.4 mm...thumbs up! The increasing estrogen shows that my follicles are growing, and the decreased progesterone shows that I haven't had an "oops" ovulation. They usually see a lining of around 7-9, so mine is exceptional. I believe the total follicle count is around 13. The biggest follicle is around 16 mm and all of the others are right behind it trying to play catch up. We are hoping that all will be mature by retrieval time.

This cycle is already looking MUCH better than last, but I'm more concerned about the quality vs. quantity. Are there going to be some good eggs inside of those follies? I'm praying every second of every day that it will work this time. I do not want to go through this again:(

I go back on Wednesday morning for labs and another ultrasound. We'll be able to better pinpoint the retrieval date at that time. They are still guessing that it will be Friday, so we shall see. I hope I can still walk by then!

Gobble

Stimulation Day 6

Oh yeah. I'm feeling it.

My estrogen went from 118 on Thursday to 635 this morning, yay! They measured 8 growing follicles...4 on my left ovary and 4 on my right. It is still very early, so there's a chance that some of the smaller ones will catch up. This time last cycle, I had 4 total follicles and one huge cyst. I would say that this time around is showing a little more promise. I go back Monday a.m. for another ultrasound and blood work.

As of now, my surgery for retrieval is scheduled for next Friday, November 20. The transfer should take place on Monday, November 23 (Day 3) or Wednesday, November 25 (Day 5).

This schedule is tentative and could change at any time over this next week. It all depends on how I continue to respond to the medications.

We always do Thanksgiving out of town with Andy's family, and according to this schedule, I will be on bed rest. If we get lucky enough to have a Day 5 transfer, then it will be the day before Thanksgiving. It sucks, but I would much rather bring a grandchild to our next Thanksgiving celebration.

My family will also be out of town celebrating Thanksgiving with my sister and her new baby girl...that is, if she's born by then. She's about 87 weeks pregnant right now...hang in there Katie! I hope I get to meet her before I'm stuck on bed rest!

Will somebody please bring some turkey and dressing by my house? Make it enough for seconds too:)

Bullseye

You see this vial of Follistim?

$509.20 each.

I have 5 of them. Each one lasts about 2.5 days. Guess what I'm going to say about that? Ridiculousness.

I do, however, have this handy dandy pen that I get to use to inject the medication with.

I decided to let go of my control freakishness and allow Andy to do the injection on Tuesday night. He has done an intramuscular injection to my backside a couple of times, so I figured this would be a walk in the park. It's very simple...just pinch my belly fat, slide the needle in, and push. It doesn't require nearly as much force as an injection into my Beyonce humps.

I think he threw it like a dart from across the kitchen and it almost pierced my bowel. Poor thing...he means well. Maybe I'll let him try again this weekend.

Today is stimulation day 4. I had blood work this morning and my E2 (estrogen) level is now 118. They would like for it to be a little higher, so they increased my dose of Follistim from 225 units to 250 units each evening.

The estrogen production increases as follicles develop and it is expected to be above 100 at this point in my cycle. From what I've been told, it will correspond with how many follicles I have towards the end. Every mature follicle should produce about 200 units of estrogen. I think.

My next appointment is Saturday morning. I will be having labs drawn again, as well as an ultrasound so that we can see what's going on in there. My nurse will call me Saturday afternoon to let me know how everything looks. I'm not too uncomfortable yet, so we'll see!

Ready for Take Off

Ultrasound is clear.

Estrogen has dropped.

No cysts.

All resting follicles healthy and happy.

Is this seriously going right for once? Why yes...it is!!!

I had about 14 resting follicles (all uniform in size) on my ultrasound this morning. My estrogen level has bottomed out which is where they want it. I am officially in artificial menopause at the ripe age of 30. The reason they do this is so that they can have full control of my cycle...IVF is all about perfect timing. They cease my body's natural hormone fluctuations and replace them with the medications I am taking by injection. Click here to read about this time last cycle.

I had a little scare this morning when I was handed my instructions for the coming days.

I was supposed to decrease my Lupron from 20 units to 10 units this morning? I already gave myself 20 units! I was supposed to add a low dose HCG injection this morning? Andy was supposed to start his antibiotics this morning? Um, what?

Keep in mind that it was already 10 am and my medications are supposed to be done no later than 8 am. In a frantic I jumped in the car to get back home as fast as I could so that I could inject myself with the other medication and grab Andy's medication to take by his work. On the way back to my house, I phoned my work to let them know not to look for me anytime soon. I also phoned my clinic in Charleston to find out why they waited until this morning to tell me this rather important information. We did, after all, pay them the equivalent of a 5 series BMW this year, so I expect nothing short of awesomeness from them.

My nurse is out of the office on vacation. Sweet ridiculousness. I left a voicemail with one of the other nurses explaining the situation and she called me back not even 5 minutes later. She said that it was okay that I took the extra Lupron and that we would just lower it tomorrow morning. The HCG injection could be given this evening with my Follistim injection, Andy could start his antibiotics tonight, and HCG could be added with the lower dose Lupron tomorrow morning. Whew. I'm confused. I know you are too.

The truckload of meds arrived last Friday and I already have them organized and ready to go. Thankfully I don't have to deal with the fear of the unknown this time. Looking at all of the vials isn't quite as overwhelming.

I took my first Follistim injection this evening to begin the stimulation phase. I'm so ready for my ovaries to feel like bowling balls again. Please let it work this time...I don't know how much longer my body and mental health can take this! I will say that this will be the ultimate test to find out the true quality of my eggs. If they are still degenerated after this perfect cycle without a cyst, then we may have a major problemo.

My next appointment is this Thursday. I believe they will just be doing bloodwork. I will probably have to go in sometime this weekend for an ultrasound. Please keep us in your prayers! I will be in touch:)

Word of the Month: Ridiculousness

I'm sure most of my infertile blogger friends read Naomi's blog on a daily basis. If not, check it out. It may not seem funny to fertiles, but it's the raw truth about infertility jacked up with sarcasm. This girl cracks me up!!!

999 Reasons to Laugh at Infertility


Hey, I have to find some way to laugh at the ridiculousness that has become my life...

Everything continues to go as planned. I'm still doing double Lupron injections every morning. I'm starting to get some belly bruises, but not too bad yet. I started my cycle this a.m., which was expected after stopping the birth control pills. I am ecstatic because this didn't happen on time during our first cycle! This means that the cyst is definitely not there and that my estrogen level has dropped. I go back for a scan and bloodwork on Monday morning to make sure everything is clear so that I can start the stimulation meds. They will also do an antral follicle count so that I can get an idea of how many possible follicles there will be to stimulate. It varies month by month...last month I had 17. So far, this has been a textbook cycle.

I can't wait to take a picture of this truckload of meds...they increased the doses which means I will probably have to choose between keeping food or medications in my fridge!

In other news, I'm about to be an aunt for the second time this year...my sister is about to have her baby girl! Anytime now!

Andy is heading down to Charleston tomorrow to drop his load at the clinic. Lucky him.
They will be separated and frozen so that they won't be hastily searching for soldiers on retrieval day. We should have plenty to choose from this time. Now, if the eggs will just cooperate.

Geez, I could have used a little more couth up there...you have to admit it was pretty funny though. Besides, we've lost all modesty nowadays. Wanna know how we accomplished that? I've put my legs up in stirrups about 500 times in the past 4.5 years. Andy has become a professional sharpshooter into the depths of a sterile container, all the while cheap porn drowns out the laughter of lab personnel on the other side of the door. Top that.

Ridiculousness. Lol.