The Perfect Dozen

So, Andy and I have been trying to fill out our egg donor application which is turning into an Olympic feat to say the least. Along with listing our own characteristics, we are having to tell them about our personality, temperament, hobbies, religion, ethnic background, etc.

The most important part is that we have to come up with two separate lists of characteristics that we require and desire in a donor. If you know us in real life, you could probably guess that this was very entertaining to us. Hey, this ridiculousness has been going on for nearly 6 years, so we have to find the humor in it. 

My intention is not to offend anybody by this post, nor be greedy and try to design the ideal child. When it comes down to it, we just want to be parents. However, you have to understand that this is the only child that Andy and I are going to have, and we are trying to request quantifiable traits that most closely resemble myself. People love to play the "Who does the child look like" game, and it's probably going to be *secretly* uncomfortable enough when someone tells me that our child has my eyes or nose, or looks nothing like me. I am not saying that it is all about looks. Please think of what you would want if you happened to be in our shoes. Genetics is a complete toss-up, so I'm happy that our child will at least be half Andy's. I will love our child regardless...but I have to be completely honest that a little piece of me is still hurting because I will not be able to carry on my family's genetic line...or my infamous ghetto booty.

Anyway, we were cracking up while creating this list...and we obviously got less serious towards the end. You will probably notice that I have a huge tooth fetish. Andy made me cross off the dental entries because he said that you can control how healthy a child's teeth are going to be by raising them with healthy habits. I disagree. I know for a fact that snaggles are genetic. I can make the child brush and floss, but if he or she only grows 8 permanent healthy teeth, then that's a problem. 

Drum roll....

Let me justify my double-jointed spider monkey toes:

 

And the bow staff...Napoleon Dynamite is my hero. Our kid better be this fly for a white guy:

I don't think the list is too much to ask. Of course, it is evident that several of these will not be on our application. Once we mail it in, we will have to undergo an excessive amount of lab testing, another saline sonogram, another trial transfer, go through counseling and be approved by a psychologist, and then be placed on a waiting list for a donor. Our nurse says that it takes an average of 6 months to be matched. Once matched, the entire cycle will take 3 months. 

We're not even close to mailing the application, so we're not even looking at anything happening until this time next year or later. For this, I would like to give a shout-out to our bank for our refinancing fiasco. I'm about to go postal on them. 

This is when I could really use Napoleon and his bow staff skills. Vote for Pedro.

This T-Shirt is Pretty Much Awesome Thursday

 

(Found on Cafepress.com...this is where I find most of these t-shirts!)

At first I wondered what this shirt was about, but after a little research I discovered that some women have what you call fried egg boobies. I interviewed Andy, and he explained it as less than a handful with a puffy...uhhum. Makes sense. 

I decided to do a little cutting and pasting in order to suit the more baby challenged folk. I think that this would be more fitting:

Fried Egg Ovaries.

Andy's Two Cents

I don't know if any of you have come across this story yet, but the hubby forwarded it to me this evening. It was originally published on Oprah.com back in September. This is a copy of the article that CNN published this morning. I'll go ahead a warn you that he gives a graphic account of his wife's miscarriage. However, it was nice to see a man's take on the subject for a change. The grieving process he described is so true...I could see a lot of our relationship in his recollection. Andy said it made him tear up while reading it, and he thought it would make a good contribution to our blog.

  

A Father's Story: Mourning the Baby We Never Had

I know that some of us get very discouraged because we feel as if the man isn't grieving after a loss occurs. In all reality, it's very difficult for them too...they just use a different outlet to release it. Add infertility to the miscarriage and you have a recipe for social isolation at it's finest.

Mad props to Oprah.com and CNN for raising infertility awareness! Now, if we could just get the insurance companies to listen!

Faith

Well, what do ya know...it seems that God whispers through Amazon. I found this vinyl wall art while perusing the web for deals on flea medications for the furchildren...it just popped right out at me! Isn't it pretty? I now get to look at it every morning when I wake up, and every evening before I go to bed. I'm having an extremely hard time keeping the faith right now, so I hope that it will help me to be a little more positive.

 I know that I have been slacking in the blog department lately. There has been a lot going on our lives, but it's not uterus or sperm related! Lucky us.

My grandmother passed away last week. She has been sick for awhile, but things took a turn for the worst and she just couldn't hang on any longer. She has been a huge supporter with our treatments and I wish that I could have thanked her with a grandchild. We were finally able to put her to rest today because the government run hospital for the military wanted to take their sweet time releasing her death certificate. Such respect. Anyway, she raised an awesome son...my father. The man will literally put everyone and everything before himself in order to help others. I'm so glad that we were able to support him during this time. I cannot even begin to imagine how it feels to lose a parent.

No news on the house refinance. We were supposed to close (again) at the end of September, but that f*ed up too. Oh, wait a minute...let me refer to my new Vinyl Wall Art.

Griswold (aka Clark, Sparky, the newest furchild) is growing like a weed. He is only 4 months old and already 34 pounds...ouch! He's very smart...so far he can sit, shake, lay down, high five, roll over, and ring the bell on the back door to let us know he has to go to the bathroom!

Here is my favorite picture of my grandmother and my father when he was a baby...rest in peace Memom!

Here are some recent pics of Griswold...passed out of course!

Griswold and his big sister Ellie May! Such sweet little siblings. Ellie hates him.

"I have faith that God will show you the answer. But you have to understand that sometimes it takes a while to be able to recognize what God wants you to do. That's how it often is. God's voice is usually nothing more than a whisper, and you have to listen very carefully to hear it. But other times, in those rarest of moments, the answer is obvious and rings as loud as a church bell." 

 ~Nicholas Sparks, The Last Song