Journey to the Center of the Uterus

Friday, April 13, 2012

Family Photo Session!

I want to share the sweet video of our family photo session...turn the volume up and get the Kleenex ready! It's a little cropped to the side because the file is big, but if you double click it will open up into full screen mode. I own a photography business and was going to attempt their newborn pictures, but they wake up crying whenever they smell me! Fail! I ended up getting maybe twenty good pictures on my own. I ended up putting a few of those on their birth announcement. Then I realized...how am I going to take pictures of the four of us? Our friend Carla saved the day! She has taken all of my niece's photos since birth, and has always done a fantabulous job. Thank you Carla for capturing these beautiful photos...we will treasure them forever!

Annndd...here are some of the pictures that I was able to capture! I love my babies!

Monday, April 9, 2012

Here Comes Peter Cottontail!

Best. Easter. Ever! We had so much fun this year. Holidays have always sucked because they are all centered around children. I mean, think about it.

Easter...you get to watch everybody else's children dress up in adorable clothes, dye eggs, and dive into Easter egg hunts.

Mother's and Father's Day...We love and celebrate our parents, but the infertile ultimately dreads these two holidays. I remember laying in bed two years ago crying allllll day...four months after our miscarriage. Ultimate suckage. Thanks Hallmark.

Fourth of July...that one was cool. I just drowned myself in my sorrows all day. Until it was time to pack the kids up and go downtown to watch firewor...oh wait.

Halloween...Answering the door for two hours to adorable little princesses and mutant ninja turtles, along with watching their parents stand on the sidewalk admiring their brood is not my idea of fun. Most of the time we would just plan a getaway and boycott Halloween. Self preservation.

Thanksgiving...Food. Alcohol. Giving thanks for your family. Check! Giving thanks for your childre...oh wait.

Christmas...Celebrating Jesus is pretty awesome, but when it came to that whole watching everyone else's children sit on Santa's lap and open presents Christmas morning...did someone say alcohol?

I'm pretty sure these two little munchkins saved me from alcoholism...lol. All kidding aside, we are truly blessed this Easter and can't wait to celebrate every flippin' holiday like it will be our last. We can't wait to see everything through their eyes...life is so much more fun with children!

Last week's checkup went well...Anderson is up to 7-9 and Baney is 9-14...ouch! They are so alert now and starting to coo when we talk to them. Baney even rolled over during tummy time...hoping that was a fluke or we're in trouble!

Oh, and they fart. Like...a lot.

Visiting the Easter Bunny!

They can't get enough...

Talking to Mmmie K!

The Easter Bunny came to give mommy & daddy some chocolate. Sorry!

Visiting Mmmie K

Easter Sunday

Torturing them

Baney confused by all of the eggs!

Love our new little family:)

Monday, April 2, 2012

Happy 1 Month, Boom Boom & Pow!

I can't believe it's already been a month. Seems like just yesterday! I would love to update more, but spending time with my babies is more important to me than Facebook and Blogger! Sorryyyy! I'm going to try to do a weekly update/pics from here on out.

All is well here at home. We continue to try and settle into a routine and we are getting there slowly but surely. I am exclusively breastfeeding and they tend to feed around every three hours right now. They have their days & nights a little mixed up, so we are trying to get that ironed out...fine tuning their schedule is especially difficult while trying to juggle visitors, but we're doing the best we can. Overall, they are very good babies and I still can't believe they are ours!

We have been visiting a lactation specialist because Anderson isn't gaining as much weight as our pediatrician would like. He has some trouble latching, so we have been practicing some new exercises with him that will hopefully prove effective at his weight check this Wednesday. He weighed 7-1 last week, but he is still not back to his birth weight of 7-2.

Baney, on the other hand, was a whopping 9-8, up from his birth weight of 8-6. Good Lawd. Child don't play!

Our next venture is finding affordable childcare for two babies (yeah right!!!). We are on a waiting list for a local church for full-time care, but I would basically be working to pay for it. If I'm going to give up over half a month's salary to a daycare, I'd rather lose that money by staying at home with them. That's not very cost efficient...nor do I want to throw them in a daycare alllll week for someone else to enjoy their milestones...I've waited too long for them! I would like to go back to work part-time at first if they let me. Keyword: If. We thought we had family lined up to help with them a couple days a week, but that fell through. So, now we are looking into in-home caregivers. Most of my family lives here in town, but everybody works or has something else to do. It's basically Andy and I fending for ourselves! It's okay though. That just means more time with our babies instead of passing them off to babysitters!

Anyway...here are some recent pics of the boys. We love them so much...they are already growing up too fast:( Thank you all so much for your sweet comments!

3 Weeks

Child makes the funniest faces!

Happy 1 Month!!!

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Happy Due Date!

Today is A & B's official due date! Lucky for us we got our hands on the little munchkins sooner, but I will always look at March 22 as a cause for celebration. We are certainly blessed beyond measure.

As I was fumbling through my nightstand looking for nursing pads earlier this afternoon, I came across a stack of sympathy cards and letters. After looking closer, I realized that I saved them after our miscarriage in December 2009. I actually don't remember getting any of them, really. I guess I was in shock and blocked them from my memory. My eyes latched onto a yellow envelope addressed to Andy and I from my grandfather...my "Mandaddy".

In case you are wondering, I was the first grandchild and created the name Mandaddy after I could not correctly pronounce Granddaddy. This name was passed along and he is now called this by all of his grandchildren. I rock.

I opened the envelope to discover a two page typed letter from my Mandaddy. I couldn't believe what I was reading.

How weird for me to come across it now, as I'm staring at the two beautiful miracles that are finally ours...and on their due date nonetheless.

I would like to share the excerpt from the letter that gave me chills and made me shake my head in disbelief. I also hope that these words give hope to someone else still fighting the infertility battle, or any battle for that matter. We are the perfect example that it is possible and WILL happen.

Dear ones, I don't know what your mindset is at this moment and it's possible that you are mad with God about what happened. Maybe not. A lot of people would be. It would be a normal human reaction to blame God when things go wrong. I know that was my way of thinking for many years when things didn't go to my liking. Sure. He was supposed to jump every time I asked for something. After all, doesn't scripture advise "...Ask and you shall receive...".

We tend to think that God is not listening to our prayers when we don't get the answer we want. We fail to recognize that he is giving us the answer that is best for us.

I believe with all my heart that our Heavenly Father is doing what is best for you. I believe it so strongly that each and every morning when I say three rosaries, you are remembered and I ask our Heavenly Father to allow you to have a successful pregnancy that goes full term, a safe delivery, and a beautiful child. And, deep in my heart I know He will hear and answer my prayers.

There's a most important ingredient needed at this point. Faith. If you don't have faith you are going to have an uphill climb. You've heard the expression: "Faith can move mountains." That's not just four idle words. "Faith" has done more for people in this world than anything else since God put man on this earth.

I know you are grieving and feel a hurt, but I want you to think about this. When I heard the latest news that you were no longer pregnant, I said to myself, as I do each morning when I pray, "Not our will, but Thy will be done".

Our Heavenly Father knew me, He knew Memom, He knew you and Andy from the beginning of time. He is all knowing. He knew if something was wrong and He saw to correct it.

You know. I've got a hunch you might have twins. They do run on my side of the family. Look out! Did somebody say quintuplets?

You will be in my prayers until it happens, now and forever...

Mandaddy and his twin great-grandsons.

Rest in peace sweet Memommy...we wish you could have been sitting next to him in this picture.

Happy Due Date Boom Boom and Pow!!!

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Two Become Four...A Birth Story

The last two weeks have been a whirlwind. I still can't believe that I am finally a mother...that we are finally parents. The love and support we have received from family and friends is unbelievable. Thank you all SO much for everything. It just goes to show that everyone wanted it as badly as we did. We are so blessed to have you all in our lives!

The morning of March 5, 2012 I went in for a scheduled C-section at 7:15 am. I barely made it to this day. Lol. We got there bright and early at 6 am to check in. They placed me in an OR holding room to do my admission, monitor A&B, and get my IV started. I hadn't had anything of substance to eat or drink since 6pm the night before, so needless to say I was pretty hungry and parched.

Soooo, leave it to me to PASS OUT while they were starting my IV and getting me to sign consents. I've never fainted in my life! They were able to get some fluids running pretty quickly and I was better in no time. I guess that my nerves and the reality of it all came crashing down on me at one time.

Once I was feeling better, my doctor stuck his head in to say hello and then they wheeled me off to the OR. They had me sit up to get a spinal block inserted. I thought to myself...I will not jump. I will not jump.

I jumped.

She was able to get it in and it was then that I was informed that I have a mild case of scoliosis. Awesomeballs. They then got a catheter inserted just as my doctor was coming in to get started! I remember looking down and they had my leg in the air. I had to ask them if that was my leg...spinal blocks are no joke!

They let Andy back after I was situated and he was able to videotape the entire procedure. We watched it later after discharge and I couldn't believe the look of terror on my face before they were born. You could hear my heart beating a million miles a minute in the background. You could see the nurse anesthetist push something in my line and my eyes glazed over as my heart rate slowed. Woman doped me up.

I remember hearing the first cry. It was the most beautiful sound I've ever heard in my entire life! Seven years of infertility torture. Nine months of the most frightening experience of my life. I may have looked happy on the outside, and for the most part I was...but on the inside I was terrified that my body would fail me again. I was so grateful, but scared to death the entire pregnancy. I will finally admit that. I still can't wrap my head around what has happened in the last two weeks. Two beautiful, perfect, healthy baby boys. To think that we almost threw in the towel and started to accept the possibility of being childless. Had that happened, we would never be holding our two miracles. I couldn't even imagine. God is so good.

Anderson LeGrande was born at 7:53 am weighing in at 7 Lb 2 Oz and 19.5" long.
Baney Stephens was born at 7:54 am weighing in at a whopping 8 Lb 6 Oz and 20.5" long.

I don't know how in the world I carried over 15 lbs of baby...now I know why I was couch ridden the last month! It was so very worth it though.

In naming our sons, we decided to stick with family names. Anderson is Andy's full name, and his grandfather's last name. LeGrande is my grandfather's middle name. Baney is named after my late uncle who passed away from a rare cancer at a very young age 5 years ago...we thought that this would be an awesome way to honor him. Stephens is Andy's grandmother's maiden name.

We had a fairly uneventful stay in the hospital and were discharged on Thursday, March 8. Anderson left a little jaundiced, but his levels were below the cutoff, so he didn't require any major intervention. Baney had an issue with some extra fluid in his stomach, but that resolved after some suctioning and TLC in the nursery.

I, on the other hand, am a complete and utter GIMP. Guess what came back? Oh yeah. The pilonidal cyst in my bungcrack. Sooooo, I had to go back to my surgeon the day after discharge and have it lanced/drained and packed with 12.5 inches of gauze. Only me! By the grace of God, my donut has allowed me to sit on my arse and breastfeed. He said that I will eventually require surgery on it which will involve a 3 month recovery period...but he doesn't want me to think about it until the boys are a little older. Eeeesh.

My C-section scar is healing up nicely...he did an awesome job and didn't use staples, yay! I have lost 40 of the 53ish pounds that I gained during the pregnancy. I believe that most of it was fluid...you wouldn't believe how swollen I was in the hospital. I think that they gave me 8 bags of fluids because I was dehydrated! I still have quite a bit of swelling in my lower legs/feet, but it is slowly resolving. Hopefully I will be back to my pre-pregnancy weight in no time!

All is well here at the hizhouse. The boys are slowly getting on a routine. As much controversy as it brings, we are trying to follow the basic guidelines from Baby Wise. By having two babies, we HAVE to get them on a schedule together or risk being up 24/7. As of now, I am tandem breastfeeding (looks like a freak show) every 3-4 hours. They are waking up to feed on their own in that time frame. They have some wake time after their feedings, and then take a nap together. We follow this cycle until bedtime where we immediately put them in bed after their night feeding. Right now they are in the pack n' play together in our bedroom, but we will eventually move them to their nursery. We've had a few rough nights where they want to party like it's 1999, but overall it hasn't been that bad. I think that we have a lot more patience because we have wanted this for so long.

Here are some pictures from their birth and the last two weeks at home. We just love them so! A huge thanks to family and friends who have brought meals over...we are so grateful!

Our lives will never be the same!

Laid out after passing out. I rock.